Parenting – Not for the faint-hearted

My frequent meetings with newly-become parents over the last couple of months enhanced my knowledge. Until I met them, I didn’t know how challenging parenthood could be. I thought going to the dentist or driving on the Andheri Station road or simply being a teenager was more challenging. I thought it would be easy. I would just make the rules “Don’t forget to tighten your bed sheet and clean your room before leaving home” and my children would follow them “Of course mom, I will do it right away. Would you want me to clean your room too?”

However, after seeing my own parents and a score more, I choose to differ. My mother loves being a mother but she does get tired of saying the same things 5 times...every hour. All parents love their children. So do my cousins who just had an adorable baby boy. They look at him with immense joy...when he’s asleep. So much peace and calm in the house. The perfect time to have a bath, sleep, eat, read the newspapers, find the lost diapers, call up a few friends and relatives, watch mindless TV...till he opens his eyes.

It’s not easy being a parent. You have to be alert, attentive and patient. You can never get too comfortable or smug because these little ones - they keep changing, yeah! They constantly keep finding new ways to drive you up the wall. I noted down a few stages that every baby (and parent) goes through. Gathered from years of experience and unasked-for research:-

The Infant Stage: The baby’s very first few months, also known as the “Will I ever get to sleep again?” stage. These are the days and nights when you only get to see your bed, never get to be in it. After changing the inestimable diapers, cereal bottles and bottled food, you will probably find yourself crying looking at the bank statements. Perfectly normal. But from the ones into this business here’s the good word: “These are the really cheap days!”

The One: The stage where the kids learn to walk but they still like to be carried around, probably because it’s easier to wipe their nose on your t-shirt. They also learn their first words. Kudos if they are “ma” and “pa” and the not their favourite word ‘no’. All is still well till they get a sibling because then their favourite word becomes “mine!”

The Two: Here, I am not referring to the age but the two dreadful words ‘I want’. Apparently, they want everything. Whatever another child has, they will want it, even if it is chicken pox. If they don’t get, they throw tantrums – and many times, they throw other things also. A good outing for them at this stage would be to a zoo, perhaps, where they can pick a tip or two on good behaviour from the monkeys.

The Three: If you think the worst is over, lol. Now is the time they learn drawing. The little artists display their art on the wall, the fridge, the sofa, the floor and any other furniture, for that matter. By now, they stop throwing tantrums. In fact, they now get you to throw them. By now, your priorities change. You no longer want to become a millionaire or an author or an entrepreneur. You just want to remain sane.

The Four: They are over the “Its mine” and “I want” stage. Ladies and gentlemen, beware of the frightful “I am bored” stage. You hear that a good 50 times during the day. Hopscotch with a stone is Stone Age to them. After watching TV and playing with their toy bikes all day, they will look up at you with the same bored face. If you think TV is bad and you put on a DVD on your computer and make them watch that, then you are getting good at parenting. However, don’t get too comfortable. For all you know, you turn to tip-toe out of the room; you hear them scream “I’ve already watched it!”


A famous man (a father, of course) had said and I quote, “When I see teen-agers having babies, I wonder if they know what they're getting into. Have they really thought it through or are they just hoping that their children, by some miracle, will be mini versions of Mother Teresa? I wish my children would be more like Mother Teresa. I'd like to send them off to Calcutta.”