The Husband: My friend’s coming over this Saturday. Finally
you guys will meet!
The Wife: Oh that’s awesome! Can’t wait! Finally I will see
him in person rather than just talking on the phone with him.
The Husband: Yeah…so what are you going to make for dinner?
The Wife: Umm...can’t we go out for dinner? That will give
us some time to actually talk.
The Husband: It would be nice if you make something at home.
He should also know what a great wife and cook you are.
The Wife: *Frowns*
(The rest of the conversation is not mentioned here for
reasons of abusive content but you, the smart reader can more or less imagine
the rest of it.)
A regular conversation on a regular bright sunny day took a nasty turn for the 30-something wife.
She was eager to meet this
friend. She was eager to have long talks with this fun friend. She would make
him feel like a member of the house, and not a guest. Then why, why was it
necessary for her to cook a meal for him to please him? Since he was just
coming for the evening, why couldn’t they have that one meal at a
restaurant? Wouldn’t it be better if they could talk about movies, and the
economy, and work, and life over a meal served to them by angels called
restaurant chefs?
Because. If they were to stay at home, things would be a
little different. She would be busy making food two hours prior to his arrival.
When he would come, she would sit with him for a few minutes only to be
interrupted by the soup boiling on the stove. And then she would lay the table
with bright new crockery and all the delicious recipes. When everything's
ready, the men would make an appearance at the table. She would serve them. He
would say all the wonderful things in the world about her food that he is still
licking off his fingers. The wife would be delighted. The husband would be
proud.
And then the two men would get up and head to the couch to
continue their heated discussion about how the last basketball game could have
been better if only Derrick Rose was back in the game. And the wife would
gather up the dishes and wash them in the sink. Then after just an hour, she
would also join the men where the friend would ask her about her life and how
she is doing. Few more minutes and the friend would announce that it was time
for him to leave. Goodbyes and see yous. The friend would offer genuine thanks
to the wife. And a couple of nice meeting yous later, the friend would leave.
As stated before, if they were to stay at home, things would
be only a little different.
And leave the wife wondering – “when did I actually meet the
friend I was so eagerly waiting for amidst the mini tornado in the kitchen?!”
It brought her to thinking. Would it be such a bad thing if the wife proposed to go out
for dinner instead of cooking at home? Would it be such a terrible idea if the
wife asked to have a quality discussion over ready-made restaurant food? Would
it be awfully sinful if she refused to spend half a day in the kitchen and
instead preferred to actually chat and be friendly to the friend?
The husband said that it is good Indian tradition and values
to greet a guest with food. The wife denied saying no to that. Maybe she did say no to being the provider of the food, but she didn’t say no to food per se. Maybe she wanted to use the
excuse of the friend to escape what she did anyway for everyday of the week.
Would that make her a terrible wife? And a terrible host?
So maybe, after the meal, the husband would be deprived of
the words, “You have an amazing and caring wife back there. I had a great time
with you guys!” Maybe he would have to hear “Your wife is amazing to talk to.
She is fun to hang out with! I had a great time with you guys!”
Now, would THAT be such a horrible thing?
Why, thought the wife, is it necessary to prove to every
outsider that she is a responsible and good wife? Why can’t this be reserved
for the husband himself? Why does she have to prove her cooking skills and her
multi-tasking talents to every friend and every relative? Isn’t it proven from
the healthy and not-at-all-pale-and-not-sickly looks of the husband?
But the wife dare not say such words aloud, lest she may be labeled
a feminist.
She would rather call her friends for dinner. And then she would ask the
husband to get down on his fours and do a 100 push-ups so she can also show off to her
friends what a wonderful man she has! J
Disclaimer: ‘The husband’, ‘the wife’ and 'the friend' in this article are
fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely co-incidental.
I understand it perfectly. I appreciate what you have penned down.
ReplyDeletesee! that's why I love you! :)
DeleteAll this to not cook one meal? OMG! kalyug hain bhai...
ReplyDeleteWho is this friend? Everyone wishes to know.
Delete@Shashaank: You ask about 'the friend' as if you already have figured out who 'the husband' and 'the wife' are :/
Delete@Ronak: You still don't get it, do you?
I prolly never will..
Deleteawesome babes!!!
ReplyDeleteBest title chosen for the story.. Perfect example how men differ in thoughts from women..
ReplyDelete@Ashi: :):)
Delete@Divs: You noticed the silliness of the title!!! Awesomeness is you ! :)
after reading this and your other pieces, i must belatedly say that you write well. We will try to be husbands who will chop the veggies in the kitchen and do the push-ups in the morning :)
ReplyDelete